Archive | October, 2013

Worried about hornets

3 Oct

We’ve been reading alarming things about the Asian Giant Hornet. They are huge! 50mm long (2 inches), with a 75mm wingspan (3 inches), and a stinger 6mm long (1/4 inch).

360px-Vespa_mandarinia_japonica2

Nasty creatures. And the reason we worry is that we plan to get some of these:

Ovis

Nice, friendly, dumb, but easy meat to giant killer hornets.

The answer is pretty obvious. A 6mm stinger may go through a sheep’s wool, but it won’t go through the protective scales of one of these:

Tree_Pangolin

A Pangolin – scaly but oh so cute.

A bit of glue and some wool, and we will have the Q-ship of the sheep world:

armadillo with wool

(Actually, that’s a wool-coated armadillo not a pangolin, but you know what we mean).

Any giant hornet that stings that beast will regret it – instant sting breakage will ensue.

BUT

Do the stings on giant hornets grow back? We really don’t know and it makes a big difference. If they don’t grow back then we’ll be better off hiring a pangolin or two from Pangolins-R-Us for part of the season. But if the stingers do grow back then we should clearly buy our pangolins outright.

Does anyone have any advice?


Disclaimer: New Zealand doesn’t actually have giant hornets. Or pangolins. It does have millions of sheep, and we do intend to get a few. However, this was just one of those strange conversations one sometimes has, in the car, on the way home.